As I Stand Witness to your Fall
by de aequitate
Summary: He paints her body with black and blue bruises whenever he wasdone. Pale white powder could only hide so much..the scented perfume could notmasked what lied beneath..she was dirty..tainted by what she has become..afterall how clean can a whore be.
1. Prologue: Forever Never Last in Your Arm

_As I Stand Witness to your fall_

_A/N: First and foremost I would just like to warn those who are reading that my grammar is absolutely horrid and I am fully aware of this…so to those who feel a need to criticize, I already know and have tried to the best of my ability to fix this problem but as you can tell its not working. _

---------------------------------------------------- (Prologue: Forever Never Last in Your Arms)

Dreams that I once have laid forgotten in his arms, duties that I stood by no longer exist with him here. My tears are empty sorrows that he wished not to see, but I could never hold onto this image of us forever any more. For everything that he whisper the night before washed away with the blood that stain my hand of this war that dragged us all in far too soon.

He was my savior, the light that was supposed to pull me out of this damn forsaken hell that my life has become. But all he did was push me further in till I could no longer figure out what was right or not. Scream fill the night of voices my mind plague me with. How many people died for him, sacrifice everything for him? Despite it all, he refused to acknowledge the truth that people was willing to die for this boy, afraid that he might fail them all. But I won't be one of those fool, because I know him. He hated them for making him feel this way, for making him run into the arms of his enemy. No, I refused to be one of those fool…but I think I might have fallen for his boyish charm already.

And here is all of me; break me if he must, lash out his anger if he will, since I can't seem to put the pieces of me back together anymore. His kisses burn my skin, leaving unwanted marks for me to explain to my Lord of to where I was last night.

"Don't leave," his voice is hoarse from the night before. He pulled me back into his arm. My resolution melts away with his piercing green eyes.

This wall that I worked so hard to build shatter with a single kiss from his lip…Damn him to hell for making me feel this way. He wasn't supposed to ask me to stay nor pretend like everything's okay, because everything was not okay.

Each time he touches me, I am damage more than ever before. "I can't," I don't have to explained to him why. "I have to go…" I hastily dressed, not ready to leave this world that we had built.

He doesn't protest anymore or tried to escape from the reality that holds us by a string, because he himself have to go back to fight for his side. This neutral zone that we constructed no longer exists in the world we live in. There is no such thing as a grey area, only in the world of fantasy does it reside. We both lived in world of black and white, good and evil, and I am everything that he fights against.

And how am I to rid of his scent before my Lord?

---------------------------------------------------- (End Prologue)

_A/N: I hope you enjoy the reading and any criticism of how I am to improve my writing would be greatly appreciated. And I do hope you bear in mind that this is merely a prologue of some sort and was intended to be vague. And this will probably be the only chapter from the first person point of view. As you can see, I am not the best of writer from such perspective. And as any fanfic author likes to end…R&R. _


	2. Chapter 01: Daughter

_As I Stand Witness to your fall_

_Disclaimer: In no ways do the characters from Harry Potter belong to me. _

---------------------------------------------------- (Chapter One: Daughter)

_Daddy...you promise me..._

She was his little girl...And he couldn't forgive himself for what she would become.

"Father, you asked for me?"

He studied his little girl, cold and calculating, waiting for another order, another expectation to follow that she had grown accustomed to. It was never supposed to be like this, she wasn't supposed to become like this, but he went too far to change everything that was engrave into her mind. This war had changed them all...

He pulled his little girl closer to him, embracing her awkwardly; she never hugged him back...

"I'm sorry," he wanted to say, but a man of his status never apologized and he was a coward to even tried to admit that he was wrong.

"You have grown I see," he released her. It was never this difficult; when had their relationship as father and daughter gotten to the point that she became a stranger to him?

"Daughter," he couldn't even say her name, "Its time for you to join us."

"Whatever you wished Father."

He turn his back on her, he couldn't face her, didn't want to. He was a horrible father, nothing in world would make it to her of what he was about to do. He didn't dare asked her for redemption nor could he refused his lord. But how far would he sacrifice what was left of his little girl for power and favors?

Everything...

And he hated himself for being so damn selfish and heartless; because no father would do what he was willing to sacrifice.

He led her through the dimly lit passage. Dark shadows dance across her pale complexion. Her eyes cast straight forward, her step light and graceful, just as he had taught her when she was little, too young to understand the significant of her lessons then.

"You will do what he asked of you, do you understand Daughter?"

"Yes Father," she replied.

"I shall not hear that my daughter has displeased our Lord," he said sternly.

"Yes Father, I understand."

She used to be his innocent little girl who would tried her best to stay up late at night just to give him a hug and kiss goodnight when he return home from work. And every morning she would wake him up just to be the first to say good morning.

...But all that washed away with his betrayal...he had broken every promised that he promised to keep.

He waited to hear the door closed behind, waited to hear the silence of the hallway...waited to hear her soft cry…

"I'm sorry Pansy..."

---------------------------------------------------- (End Chapter One)

_A/N: Please don't mind the bad grammar. _


	3. Chapter 02: Whore

_As I Stand Witness to your fall_

_Disclaimer: In no way this any characters from the Harry Potter series belong to me. _

---------------------------------------------------- Chapter Two: Whore

She doesn't cry anymore nor does she plead for him stop. Her body is numbed from his constant beating...It doesn't really matter though, since after all Pansy Parkinson only purpose was to serve her Lord. Someday he would be gentle; he would whisper lies into her ears, promise her the world...but she knows as soon as the words escape his lips, everything that she once hope for will disappear with what was left of her.

She promised Daddy that she'll be an empty shell of herself, a doll for her Lord to use. Daddy will be proud of what has she become, but Daddy won't know that because as soon as Daddy walked away Pansy knew that Voldemort had him killed because Daddy knew too much.

"My Lord, did your meeting go well," She asked softly.

He was young again…the image of Voldemort, the Dark Lord of the wizarding world no longer exist within the wall that he called home. It was only Tom Riddle…he was no longer the man that carelessly murder thousand cold hearted, he was no longer the man that sent shiver down the back of every wizard and witch, he was only the man that made her unclean.

He captures her lips with his, he smelt of death and decays…little children too young to die…and the heavy stench of blood filled her nostril. She was his release an escape for him from the pool of blood that encompassed his being. His younger form could not fathom why so many had died; he never intended to walk the path he was on.

"I need you…" He doesn't have to ask. Each night their routine became an endless cycle that neither one could break. She didn't want to break it. He was all she had left. Pansy would be nothing without her lord. She no longer has the name to back her up, the money to hold her status high in the eyes of pure blood families. He took everything from her, blind her to everything that she has become.

He paints her body with black and blue bruises whenever he was done. Pale white powder could only hide so much before he washed it off with his fist. He throws her body against the wall, his scream echo through her ears. He doesn't care if her body no longer moves whenever his touch becomes too harsh. He doesn't care if his touch no longer burns her skin when she is too cold. And sometime he would garnish her lips with crimson red paint; he hated the color.

Tears go unshed...because she really did care.

---

She stood in the shadow, hidden away from the rest of the death eaters. He didn't want them to know that he was still mortal, that he still succumbs to human desire. And she was proof of that. She was his weakness…

She would never have to fight nor would she ever have the chance to stand by his side. How was she to compete with Bellatrix Lestrange for that position? Bellatrix Lestrange was a fighter, a powerful witch and what was she to him? Even now, Bellatrix sits next to her Lord, blindly devoted, unaware that she was disposable when it comes to him. She found it amusing that Bellatrix can be reduced to nothing more than a silly school girl when it comes to her Lord. She doesn't envy her position…

"…to those who has tainted our world will soon parish in the fire of hell."

…And no matter how much she bathe, or how clean she was...the scented perfume could not masked what lied beneath...she was dirty...tainted by what she has become...after all how clean can a whore be?

---------------------------------------------------- End Chapter Two

_A/N: Sorry if this is another short chapter. I kind of had prewritten the first two chapters. The next chapter would most likely be longer and some Harry and Pansy interaction. This is going to be a slow pace story. If anyone is anticipating romance any time soon, sorry to disappoint. Please mind the grammar and criticism would be nice. _


	4. Chapter 03: Acronychal

_As I Stand Witness to your fall_

_Disclaimer: In no way does any of the characters from the Harry Potter's series belong to be. _

---------------------------------------------------- Chapter Three: Acronychal

How many had died because of her betrayal…

By nightfall he would come back…his dark robe drench in blood. She could hear the scream that filled the dark sky through his eyes. She no longer understood this war that they fought…for what caused did Draco died for? What made this man that stood behind her so powerful? He is after all only mortal…

She placed her brush down, turn to faced him…he doesn't have to speak. She knows him, despite his best attempt to pretend that emotions don't exist in this room, their room. She unbutton his shirt, her fingers traced the scars he painted on himself. Countless numbers of scars graced her body and too many times did she become drunk from her own blood. But none of that matters…only him.

He crushed her body to him. "Pansy…" His breathing heavy, his body warm against her skin and she hated him every time he comes home like this…he slammed her body against the vanity table and all the scented perfume comes crushing down. The music box her mother once gave her played endlessly in her head; it numbed away the pain. He didn't care if she bleeds; he didn't care if her body hurt from his touch, just as long as she makes his pain disappear.

He grabbed her, their lips crushed together. "Make it all go away Pansy…"

"Tom…" And each time she grasps out for him, he slips away between her fingers like the memories of her childhood. No matter how many times he comes home to her, Pansy could never really make all the nightmares that plague his dream fade away. She couldn't even cure the nightmares that visit her each night when he was done, how was she to cure his? All Pansy could do was dull his for the moment, make him forget for a moment…wasn't that her job to begin with. How much can a whore really do? She never sign up to save him, but their fate was so deeply intertwined that she can't seemed to unweave all that was done. She was too far in…she wasn't even supposed to last this long.

Draco promise to come for her in one year time…but all that washed away when Harry Potter killed him. Did she expect for Draco to come and take her away, to say that he loved her and that this war no longer matter? But who she to compete with Fate when it comes to promises…

---

There was so much blood that flowed too freely within the castle wall. The lower rank death eaters were brutally murder one by one. They didn't even have a chance. All she could do was stand and watch. Stop it, stop it all, she wanted to yell to make everything go away but all that escape her lip was a tiny whimper. She wasn't a fighter nor was she brave; that sort of thing was left to Gryffindors. Pansy couldn't utter a single spell to save any of them; she was helpless in such situation. A woman of her status doesn't play the part of the heroine, that role was reserve for someone else. The role she was meant to play was of a broken doll and she played it well. And Daddy would be proud of her.

"Pansy," a soft voice entered the room.

Her eyes shift from the ticking of the minute hand to the door. Her body becomes numb. She didn't want to see him and each time she does she swear that the Gods were punishing her for her sins. The silent that encompass the room was unbearable. His cold gaze stabbed her. "Blaise," she hated that her voice betray her every time she sees this man. "Did something go wrong?"

He stepped out from the shadow. He was no longer beautiful; his body was torn apart from the war. How long ago did he used to stand up tall and pride? How long ago when all they thought about was house rivalry not of who was left to fight in this war that she could careless for?

"We have to get out of here, the Orders have broken through our spell," he grabbed her arms. His words passed through her. And her only thoughts were not of the dangers that she was in but whether or not Tom was saved from the Orders.

"But Blaise, we can't leave. Tom isn't here yet." He stared at her confused.

"Tom?" He turned her to face him. Where did all the innocent in his eyes gone off to? "Pansy, all that matter is me getting you out of here. Lord Voldemort entrust me with your safety." And before he pulled her through the door she heard him murmur, "And I promise Draco that I'll keep you safe no matter what."

But Blaise don't you understand that promises were made to be broken.

---

Her heart raced as Blaise held her close to him. His arm wrapped around her tiny waist. She was much too frail to be okay. "Don't move," he whispered in her ear.

What was she supposed to do? She couldn't rely on herself; she no longer had a wand to hide behind. Two wands stay pointed at them. They weren't honorable as they had hoped the wizardring world would see them as. Could they not see that one was a cripple and the other defenseless? Two wands stayed pointed at them still. Blaise wouldn't be able to protect them that she knows. His wand shake in his hand, his body was failing him.

"Stupefy," both men shouted. She couldn't tell who they were; the hooded cloak they wore hid their face from her.

"Ennervate," but Blaise wasn't strong enough to counter their spell knocking him to the ground.

"Blaise," she screamed his name as his body bang against the castle stone wall. She tried to run to him to see if he was okay but her feet were glued to the ground. Damn them she wanted to shout. "Can't you see that he hurt?" Her logic didn't make sense, of course they saw the blood running down his head but it wasn't their place to care nor was it her place to be caught in the crossfire between the Orders and the Death Eaters' battles. After all, she was just a whore…

One of them grabbed Blaise and apparated out of the castle wall. She screamed his name over and over in hope that they'll bring him back. He grabbed her, pulled her to him. She wouldn't let them take her; Tom was going to come back and save her.

"Stay still Parkinson, this might hurt," he harshly whispered in her ears.

"Harry?"

---------------------------------------------------- End Chapter Three

_A/N: I know this wasn't as long as some might hope, but I did try my best. And I know I did promise that Harry would be in this chapter, I just didn't realize that he was going to be receiving only two lines. Sorry about that, but the next chapter should have more Harry and Pansy interaction. And about the grammar I'm not really good at finding one, but I hope that the grammar is not so bad that you can't stand to read it. And I would just like to thank those who some time to drop a review, Thank you. _


	5. Chapter 04: Prelapsarian

_As I Stand Witness to your fall_

_Disclaimer: In no way do I claim the Harry Potter series as my own nor is any profit made from this. _

---------------------------------------------------- Chapter Four: Prelapsarian

He said that he will always be there to catch her each time she decides to fall, but she learned to never trust forever. Because in the end, nothing truly last, forever only last for so long before it begins to fade away like a distance memory. However she could never seem to erase his voice from the back of her mind because she always did expect to see him at the bottom of her every fall. She could no longer put the pieces of her self back together again, and this time she knew that she was finally going to reach the bottom.

---

Darkness enclosed her body with its cold fingers wrapped around her. It mock at her misery as she laid the last remaining dignity she had left for them to pick apart and all she could do was stare. Because Pansy Parkinson wasn't as strong as they thought she was nor was she as important as they assume she would be. The pain from the chain on her wrist didn't hurt when it turn blue or did the blister on her back when she couldn't offer them any information because Pansy was too numb to care. She doesn't give them the satisfaction of knowing that what they were doing was breaking her more than she could ever admit. And so she allowed them to get away with calling her a dirty whore, to push her down, and to take away everything but the broken shell of her self; she doesn't have the strength to fight them. All she had was the stillness and nothingness to keep her company and that could only keep her sane for so long before she lose herself. It makes her wonder if their side was just as cruel and malicious as that of the dark side.

When she sees his green eyes staring at her through the darkness she thinks that maybe there still some mercy left in him, but Pansy was never that bright…So she lived in that world of false pretense believing that whenever he visit this prison that she called her own, his touch doesn't burn her skin. Despite the lies she tells herself…his touch always burn just like Tom except it hurts more than he could ever hope to imagine, since it never did before.

"I can end your life here if I want," she didn't dare look. It always hurt to look at him now. He wasn't the same boy she knew back at Hogwarts nor did he live up to his name. His eyes pierce through her soul as he stared at her in disgust; he always could read her so easily. All she could do was continue to play this childish game they once dance endlessly to, but this time around it was no longer just pretend because he really did want to hurt her. This time around however, she allowed him to hurt her because when all the pain goes away she knew that the numbness is the only thing left that will comfort her from the nightmare that plagues her dreams.

Pansy doesn't look up at him when he spoke nor did she care to replied, either way she knew that everyday they would replay the same day over; it was a routine that neither one of them dare to break. "I know you can Harry," everything that were said from the day before, comes rushing back for them to continue this vicious cycle that they build around themselves. In the end they both know how the story plays out and it wouldn't hurt as much when they continuously replay the same story over and over.

He pulled her body off the ground. He hated when she becomes like this because he wasn't sure if she could feel anymore. "Then why do you continue to protect him?" He asked because it really did hurt that she forgot about him so easily and no matter what he did, he never really could claim her as his own.

"It's all I have left to hold onto," she replied her dark eyes stared back into his. "When you took him away," she quietly added. Never once did he ever regret throwing her body against the wall and hearing her soft whimper.

The blood that runs down her face, the bruise that covers her skin did not matter to him, but when he holds her in his arm he realized that they never did fitted more perfectly together until now. She was the one thing that remains constant in his life and he thrives over the control he had over her.

He hated it when she didn't cry… "When did everything change?" She quietly asked as his body loomed over her frail one. She really was weak.

"When you decided to walk away Pansy…" And she cried for the both of them because this game that they played was never supposed to end like this.

---

He knew he was falling faster than he can catch himself when all he could do was hide behind the shadow with his head bow down to the darkness that wrap him around her fingers. Nightmare wasn't supposed to come true and all those dreams that plague his thought in the mist of the night came rushing back with each passing day. As everything came undone, crumbling before his eyes, all the while he could only wonder whether or not she was okay; he knew that Fate played a cruel joke on him. He just wished that it would end because he hated that he care. It was easy to pretend not to care, because each night he played the part of the monster.

Despite himself he could no longer put up the façade that she was nothing more than a whore when he was completely consumes with her. And everything that defines him washed aside when it comes to her because this war no longer matter when she no longer waits for him.

"My Lord, Miss Parkinson's body was found last night…" And everything stop when he came crashing down.

---

Because dreaming is only masked by eternal blissfulness…

---------------------------------------------------- End Chapter Four

_A/N: I am truly sorry for the delay. In fact I had actually finished this chapter two weeks ago; however as stupid as I am I accidentally save over that version with writing of mine. And the funny thing is I prefer this version over the first, because the first version was a tad bit fluffy and I don't consider myself a "fluff" writer. I don't know if it was some supernatural interventions that subconsciously force me to save over that version or what but I am glad that I did. Well anyway I hope you enjoy and I thank those who took some of their time to review this little fic of mine. _


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